There is a battle waging in my head.
The battle between...acceptance and...refusal.
Acceptance of the mediocrity that has ravished this place.
And refusing to panic in the event that I might have made the biggest mistake ever.
Where does one begin?
What does one do?
Reject the widely accepted passivity of the shadiness that is considered a norm?
But to what end?
To what means?
How will anything get done?
Across the Atlantic, the ease to spit criticism, and demand that things be different is alarming.
But not apparent until you get to this side of the Atlantic, where mediocrity is the ruler of the land,
and excellence, service and honor have been exiled for life.



There is a battle waging in my head,
but what Im really wondering is
Is there any hope at all?

xxx
Fabulo-la


P.S. Im not dead, I just need ideas/inspiration on what to write.
Feel free to leave a suggestion in the comments ;)

Comments (6)

On April 21, 2011 at 1:36 PM , Tega said...

You seem to be having a hard time adjusting to how things are done at home...i feel your pain...Hang in there...Choose and Fight the battles a little at a time and never accept mediocrity

Good luck babe...x

 
On April 22, 2011 at 6:09 AM , mizchif said...

You know what this reminds me of?
That day in the Verastic chat room when we had one of those "Nigeria" debates after the show. I'm sure you remember.

I can relate with this post, especially as i just visited.
Almost everyday i saw things that made me want to weep and almost everyday, affirm my choice not to move back. My mother even reminded me how adamant i was not so long about moving back after my degree, but sadly, now i'm just as adamant about not moving back. Sad, i know.

It's definitely easier to have hope when you're all the way on the other side of the atlantic, but when the mediocrity and shadiness stares you in the face everyday? Not so much.

I've rambled enough.
I need you to post more often though, not like i'll help with ideas and suggestions, just blog.

 
On April 22, 2011 at 12:38 PM , Etoile Oye said...

There is hope. I always remember our forefathers had it worse than us and shone through. It's a damn long tunnel. But there is hope. I think we often forget that what we see and admire did not take years, but centuries to build. It's a big gap, but it's fast closing. There is hope *reminds self*

Tell us about some of your frustrations and what you think needs to be done...

 
On April 22, 2011 at 6:50 PM , T.Notes said...

You'll live. One day at a time,and do blog often,if it'll help.
Think i have a reasonable idea of your feelings...but i'll keep my opinions.Worse case,if it doesn't work out,you head back...or just cozy up in a posh flat in lekki and spend ur days watching good t.v??Weak smiles.

 
On April 25, 2011 at 8:37 PM , Myne Whitman said...

You know the truth, sometimes naija tire me. Hmmm...

Take care and good luck!

 
On May 2, 2011 at 4:01 PM , Jaycee said...

Never settle for mediocrity, or what people 'allow' to be the norm. On the other side of the Atlantic, many things are accepted...but there remains higher standards.

There's hope sha...:)