Another long day at the office, and nothing seems to have been accomplished.
Why are men always adamant to work with a woman? Abi is it just these Nigerian men that don't want to deal with a Nigerian woman? Are they that intimidated? Na wa o! Working with these engineers has not been easy.
Three years as 'Engineer-in-charge', and you'd think they would have gotten used to it by now.

I buzz my secretary and tell her not to forward anymore calls. Its 4.00pm, and I need a break.
I kick off my Pradas, take off my blazer and settle into the traditional judges' chair I ordered specially. Funms was right, these things are soo comfy. I still need to meet with the process engineers before picking her up from the airport.
Just then my cellphone rings
"Mama lemme upgrade you..."

It can only be one person.
"Hi Temie.."
"Boys boys! I have told you! Be quiet when mummy is on the phone!.."
She yells.
"My favorite boys behaving themselves?"
"Mehn...Fabsy, I think it is time for mummy to take a break....Nathaniel, say hello to Aunt Fabs.."
"Hi Aunty.."
He says in his cute american accent but with a hint of french, spanish and everything else Temie is teaching them.

"Hi, my love. I miss you."...
I coo into the phone. Nathaniel is my small boyfriend.
"misth you too.." he tells me.
".. seriously Fabs, when are you coming to babysit for me now? Me and honey need a break jo."
"Err..Temite I don't know about that one o. U forget me sef I have babies of my own, and..."

"Those are dogs jo! Not children."
She cuts me off.
"Schewwww. It is time for us to find u a real man jere..all those engineers and you can't find ONE? What is Nigeria doing to you eh?"
"You have started o Temie..."
I warn her. For the life of her, Temie cannot understand WHY I have refused to (in her own words) "marry a good man".

"Ehen! And if I start nko?...Nikolai.. Partez de là! Momie ne l'aime pas...when are you coming to New York jo? The boys miss you."
"Well... I'm supposed to be meeting Alexio in Cyprus in a few days..."

I can hear her rolling her eyes..

"You and this white boy ehn? Is it not tme for it to be over? Ok o.."
"Ha ha Tems. Very Funny. Maybe I should bring him to NY instead to babysit with me while you are away with honey eh?"
"Ah no..s'okay...we will be fine."
She quickly adds. Temies dislike for my choice of men is anything but subtle.

"You will be alright Tems. Alexio means no harm jo."
"Hmm hmmm..Hold on Fabs, the intercom is buzzing..."

"Secretary Generals Office. How can I help you?"
"Yah, its Funms. Put Tems on please."
"Yes ma'am."

"Hello ... ?
"Fabs, Funms is on the phone."
"Funms! Aren't you supposed to be on a plane back here?"
I ask.

"Ehh..Fabs I was going to call you about that, but err..change of plans.."
"Change of plans? Why? Where are you going?"
"New York."
"New York?!"...
Tems and I scream at the same time.

"What for? Why? Didn't you just come from your honeymoon around the world?"
I query Funms.
"So you'll babysit?"
Temie asks hopefully.

"Ok ok Ladies! And Tems no I can't babysit, sorry. But with all the Secret service Tems, you can't get anyone to babysit?"
Funms answers.
"You know how she likes to be with her boys all the time now.."
I tell Funms.

"Then what are you coming here for?"
Tems asks slyly.
"Some benefit for hubby. Decided to join him last minute. Can't pass up the oppurtunity to play dress up now can I?"
Funms explains.

"But Funms, we were supposed to have dinner tomorrow and discuss.."
I whine into the phone.
"Ehn I know Fabs, I know. But I have a better proposition for you girls."
"It better involve a holiday."
Temie groans into the phone.

"Well not exactly. But first we need to get Bumight on the phone."
"I spoke to her earlier, she should be in surgery."
Temie says.
"Yah I left a message for her to call me back. The nurse said it should only be a few more...Oh here she is now...hold on."


"Whatever idea Funms has, I hope it involves some kind of holiday"
I say.
"I hope it involves some Nigerian men we can hook you up with."
Temie says without missing a beat.


"Temie! Is it not time for you to get off this girls case?"
Bumight says into the phone.
"Help me tell her jo."
"But wait eyin gels, shey you people don't think it is time for her to..."
"Temie you will have all the time you want to harass her. Leave her for now."
Funms interjects.

"Yes ladies whats up?" Bumight says.
"How was surgery Doc?" I ask Bumight. "Save another life?"
"Mehn..for a second there we almost lost the poor little boy. But thank God..I stayed awake in med school."
"Hahahaha Ejo e ko." Its not your fault. Temie says. "Hows Wande doing, Bumight?"
"He's fine o. We are thinking of taking a second honeymoon sef."
"Second ke? Some people havent even taken the first one" Temite points out.
"Me I dont know what you are talking about." I add.

"Ok o girls, I know we have all been having a rough few weeks..." Funms cuts us off.
"Except you that has been on her honeymoon.." I interject.

"Like I was saying..." Funms continues pointedly."We have all been stressed so I was wondering if you guys could take a few days off to go to..Venice? All expense paid. Uh?"

"Ve-kini? how exactly is this trip going to happen in a few days?"
I ask. "And you forget we are all on different time zones.."
"How did I know you will say that? The engineer. Always calculating and recaculating. Its not a problem...Hubby is letting us use the jet and.." Funms explains
"Im down. I'll just reassign my surgeries. But it can ONLY be a few days o! Anything else?" Bumight asks before she can finish.

"Nope. Will day after tomorrow work for you Doc?" Funms asks.
"Sure thing. See you ladies later."

"Wait.What just happened Funms?" Temie asks."Did you just offer to take us to Venice for a few days?"
"Yep. Prolly not more than 48 hours, seeing as we are all really busy... "

"Im down o! I was just making sure I heard correct ni. Not a problem" Temie says.

"You are sure the boys and the UN will survive without you?" Funms asks.

"They will be just fine I was taking next week off anyways..." Temie adds.
"Cool. Fabs you nko?" Funms asks me.
"Im still trying to figure out how exactly this trip is going to happen.." I tell Funms.

Again I can hear Funms roll her eyes at me. They seem to do that alot.

"Ok here is how it will work eh Fabs? Tems and I will leave NY in the morning day after tomorrow, sometime around 9 maybe Tems?" Funms asks.

"That works Funms..." Temie answers.
"We will pick Bumight up about 10 ish, refuel and head to Lagos to get you. That should put us there about 6 am your time. We refuel and head out. Should be in Venice by lunch. Again I will have to check with the pilot sha. But does that sound good to you?" Funms asks me.

Sounds like she already had it all planned out.

"Err..sure..Guess I'll see you ladies in a few days." I answer.

"Oh and dnt bother to pack any bags, we are going SHOPPING!" Funms adds.

"Venice here we come. Alright ladies its homework time for the boys. See yu later muuaaahhh."
"Bye Tems."
"Bye Temie."

"So? Sound good to you engineer?"
"Sounds perfect Funms. See you later."
"No problem babes."

I hang up the phone and marvel at the girls. Nothing like a chat with the BFFs to lighten up a girls day.
The intercom buzzes.
"I said no calls Stella!"
"Its the technicians from the Accra plant ma."

Sigh.....I guess I'm going to Venice with the girls then.


Comments (25)

On November 2, 2009 at 2:24 AM , Temie said...

OMG We are soooo COOL!!!
I can imagine this and I hope it happens just like this.

On November 2, 2009 at 5:08 AM , tunrayo said...

nice daydream, i'm almost jealous

On November 2, 2009 at 6:03 AM , juiceegal said...

Awwwww really nice story....Sounded almost real sef...hahaha at bumight marrying wande, shey this obsession is not becoming something else like

On November 2, 2009 at 9:37 AM , Bubbles said...


this was cute
I am actually jealous!
I'm going to do my own mayne
Juicee are you down?

On November 2, 2009 at 10:16 AM , Myne Whitman said...

Please write more...the blogger girls on a roll....Very good...

On November 2, 2009 at 10:19 AM , neefemi said...

immma say an Amen to due time

On November 2, 2009 at 11:06 AM , bumight said...


lol @ "thank God i stayed awake in med school"!
abi o, thats how its going to be in a couple of years time - including the marrying wande part hehehe.
Reminds me of the show Cashmere Mafia but they stopped airing it too!

I can totally see Temite and Funms like that! and why is everyone married but u? so that u can have the pilot to yourself abi?

oya lemme go do Ad on Twitter!

On November 2, 2009 at 11:23 AM , Funms-the rebirth said...

Oh my gosh! I had tears in my eyes reading this! Gosh u guys r d best bffs and I can totally see us like this very soon
But we have to find u a fine looking brotha o! All those oyinbo no pay

On November 2, 2009 at 11:53 AM , leggy said...

lol.....i was wondering at the beginning wat the hell is fabulola talking about?lol.
ill say a big amen to this story.

On November 2, 2009 at 12:56 PM , sweetness said...

lol at first i was like
"... am i missing something?"
then i was like
ohhh ohhhhh
i get it

On November 2, 2009 at 1:33 PM , ~B~ said...

LoL! I had t remind myslef dt y'all still in skul, U write really gud, Amen sha!

On November 2, 2009 at 5:09 PM , RepressedOne said...

lol awww lovely story!! You write really well. I could almost see it play out. I hopes it turns out that way for you all. Sounds like a great sisterhood.

On November 2, 2009 at 9:07 PM , kay9 said...

Is somebody day-dreaming? :)

On November 2, 2009 at 11:22 PM , Nice Anon said...

this whole day dream dikwa very serious o!

On November 3, 2009 at 1:42 AM , Original Mgbeke said...

LOL, I love it! You're such a great writer, I could literally see it happening in my head. Very nice one indeed.

On November 3, 2009 at 12:51 PM , Rene said...

i love this

On November 3, 2009 at 8:43 PM , Tinu said...

it felt soo real!!gosh u write well!

On November 4, 2009 at 11:23 AM , The Girl with the Red Hair said...

Love this!!!

On November 4, 2009 at 11:24 AM , The Girl with the Red Hair said...

Love this!!!

On November 4, 2009 at 1:52 PM , Tatababe said...

Wow! I like very much...

On November 5, 2009 at 11:02 AM , HYAW said...

i envy your ability to see the future. i don't sha envy your office. nice story

On November 7, 2009 at 10:15 PM , miss.fab said...

Lol this was cute haha

On November 9, 2009 at 2:35 PM , Miss Natural said...

loved the camaderie. lol lifestyle of the rich and famous. no suffering for you pple at all (but yes in Jesus name, no suffering for you guys in reality) lol, good writing, i was immersed in the characters!

On November 18, 2009 at 3:14 AM , TinTin said...

tohhh bad!!!

On November 20, 2009 at 10:58 AM , Thoughtstreams said...

You gals made my evening!!! was an excellent read fab!!